Ready for a zany, irreverent, and sexy mystery that will have you turning pages into the wee hours? Well, here it is:
SKELETON: A Bare Bones Mystery
THE PLOT
A Blockbuster employee on a smoke break discovers a human skull in an overflow pond, setting off speculation that the skull may belong to a graduate student at the local college who mysteriously disappeared the year before. Inspector Jeremy Wolf, a widower, wine lover, would-be author, and long-time detective, takes on the case, assisted by Jack Mathers, a curmudgeonly medical examiner with a fondness for jelly donuts, and Kate McCormick, a beautiful rookie officer who has more than a passing interest in Wolf.
The continuing investigation leads Wolf and Kate through taxidermy shops, dermisted beetle farms, tattoo parlors, and the halls of the local university. And then more women begin disappearing.
Through all this, Wolf and Kate are hounded by TV reporter Paige Pataki, who hopes to displace the current top story—the strange appearance of an emu in town and the fruitless, Keystone Kops attempts to capture it—by an in-depth series on the evolving case that she hopes will finally land her an anchor job. The stories, with on-screen interviews of Wolf and Kate, do not go unnoticed by the killer, especially where Kate is concerned.
THE OTHER CHARACTERS
• Leaf Erickson (an amateur environmentalist, who has a habit of “casting” people on their resemblance to actors)
• Jelly Jansen (line supervisor at Vibrildo Corporation, maker of fine sex toys)
• Sonya Alvarez (pleasure tester at Vibrildo)
• Lester “Less” Owens (the dwarf proprietor of A Fur Off Place taxidermy salon)
• Pinky Brown (owner/artist at Ink-a-Dink Tattoo and Piercing)
• A reward-seeking, emu-hunting cowboy and his faithful horse
• A piece of DOTS candy
• Bob White (a cheap white wine and close personal friend of Inspector Wolf)
• Faith Pancake (college student and lover of Sophie Vestibule)
• Sophie Vestibule (graduate student and lover of Faith Pancake, Jonathan Dorn, and Professor Ronald McDormand)
• The Principessa (Sophie’s trusted vibrator)
• Jonathan Dorn (English Major)
• Ronald McDormand (English Professor)
And that’s not counting a host of other memorable characters driving the action and creating good, good, good, good vibrations